quickie: college

Good news, my loyal readers! I'm off to visit a foreign land; a land populated by big-breasted alcoholics and muscular Dave Matthews fans. This land is known as "the place where integrity goes to die", and "keg city, USA". It is a majestic land full of paddling, either woman on man, or much more likely, man on man. It is a land which many desire to one day see, and which many suffer and toil for, only to be told they aren't ethnic enough. Luckily for me, my father was an illegal, so, hey, free College!

Oh yeah, that's what i was talking about before. The land is College. Kind of a stretched out pun, and I'm sure you saw it coming, but I thought, what the fuck, I'm going to college.

I know what some of you are thinking; it's only June! Why are we worrying about you now, oh sacred leader? The answer is simple, fatty; September comes soon enough, and I've got a lot of work ahead of me before I can settle into my new home. To quote my father on my sixth birthday, I might not have enough time to love you anymore. Then he walked out the door, his sweaty hand cradled by the smooth, manicured fingers of the mail man. I'd never seen him smile so big before...

Anyhoo, that's the long and the short of it, and the reason why I haven't posted for real in a while. Hey, I gotta get weed connections, and because I don't believe in MySpace, I'm doin' it the ol' fashioned way. I'll pop in every now and again, and I'm sure during college I'll find some extra funny things to say about white women, but for now, we'll have to get used to seeing other people.

Kisses and toodles,
Spence Fiffield, AKA Darsh

P.S. I know I threw a sponsorship towards that white chick, http://www.fockenspock.blogspot.com, in my 'Blogs I'm Following' section (she's a friend, I guess), but lately she's been a huge wang. Everyone hate mail her! Her weaknesses are:
1)A really bad stutter (she's convinced it's 'cute', when it's about as cute as a root canal)
2)A huge schnoz (you ever see Groucho Marx?)
3)She's a Catholic (everyone mock her for her practice of religious freedom!)