Saturday, May 16, 2009

quickie: Niger1

Lower your guns, loyal readers; the war between Nigers and the Darshans has come to a peaceful resolution.

I know you're all disappointed that a horrific and bloody battle did not ensue at my behest, however, I think I speak for myself and the deposed Prince of Niger (who refuses to answer my e-mails) when I say that in the end, we all wanted a win. A win for me, that is. And we all got that in the end.

I was about to give my top officer, some Korean guy named 'Wang' (I know, can you believe it?), the order to fire on the imposing Nigers when I got an urgent e-mail for niger1@yahoo.com. I present it in its entirety.

Dear Darsh,

I surrender. Please, call back your fatwas on my family, and I will pledge my allegiance to you. I have sent those vials of blood you asked for as well.
One Love, Niger1

First of all, I'd like to say that it takes a big man to apologize. However, it takes a bigger man to gloat about his superiority on his own blog. I retain the crown, bitches! Oh, and to my so-called BFF the deposed Prince of Niger: what the hell, dog? We were supposed to hit up Dave & Buster's last week. You ditched me like some punk-ass trick! You've changed, man.

1 comment:

Queen Of The Interweb said...

Yeah me and the Prince hit it up and went to Ben & Jerrys, I had to pay though, can you believe that. You think prince has alot of money right, wrong. So yeah sorry I stole your date.....not really